港澳人才看得懂的英文+各卡通人物的悲慘下埸+蜘蛛和蜜蜂的婚姻

1)港澳人才看得懂的英文
So many people die, never see you die.　甘多人死，唔見你死。
You teach me how to come out and walk in the future?　你教我以後點出?行?
If you have enough ginger, put your horse to me.　如果你夠姜既話就放馬過?。
“I saw a pork chop”　我見到件豬扒啊。
Are you road?　你係咪路啊？
What the water are you?　你係乜水啊？
Do you big me?　你大我啊？
Zebra chops people.　班馬劈友。
The king of the cutting girl.　界女王。
Cut my head and let you sit on it as a chair.　批我個頭俾你當凳坐。
Do you think me didn’t arrive?　你當我無到？
You have seed, I will give you some colour to see, brothers, together up.　你有種，我會俾D顏色你睇，兄弟，同我一齊上！
Today I was very black son.　今日我好黑仔。
I am wearing grass.　我著緊草。
Two beat six.　二打六
Two five son.　二五仔
Piano piano green.　琴琴青
I give you some colour to see see.　我俾D顏色你睇睇！
Stupid stupid want to move .　蠢蠢欲動。
People mountain people sea .　人山人海。
How senior are you?　你算老幾?
What the ghost are you talk?　你講乜鬼?
I fear that you have teeth.　我驚你有牙！
Heart flower angry open.　心花怒放。
Fish skin　魚皮。
Monster of blowing water.　吹水怪。
Face green green　面青青。
You see road carefully　你小心睇路
You go to street carefully　你出街小心D。
Do the world　做世界。
Big tea rice　大茶飯。
American chinese not enough.　美中不足。
King eight egg.　王八蛋
High hand.　高手
DO YOU Old dot ME?　你老點我呀?
One old water　一舊水
I know your mouse.　我識你老鼠！
Measure water/Pound water.　磅水
A dragon service.　一條龍服務
Pump water.?　抽水
I blow chicken to beat your group of the guys.　我吹雞打你班友。
You jump building.　你跳樓啦。
You come back home and eat banana　你返屋企食蕉啦
I give you a hair.　我俾條毛你ar!
Collect skin　@@(大家都估到係咩)
Collect father　收爹
You give me collect father.　你同我收爹！
Laugh die me.　笑死我。
You give me stop.　你同我企系度。
Eight woman　八婆
I know your mouse.　我識你老鼠！
You give me collect father.　你同我收爹！
You teach me how to come out and walk in the future?　你教我以後點出泥行?

2)各卡通人物的悲慘下埸
Hello Kitty
因為沒有口進食，所以經常營養不良

Qoo 酷兒
因為經常飲果汁，於是導致肺積痰

Minna No Tabo 大口仔/大寶
因為經常張開口，用口呼吸，結果肺積塵

比卡超/皮卡丘
經常發電，令體毛燒焦，出現嚴重脫毛情況

小熊維尼 Winnie the Pooh
罕有蜜糖熊，擔心成獵殺目標，壓力過大，開始出現思覺失調(即精神分裂)

加菲貓 Garfield
在角色上，需暴飲暴食，故有潛在的血管閉塞危機

史諾比 Snoopy
經常幻想自己是飛機師，開始有小小妄想症的頃向

賓尼兔 BUG BUNNY
甘筍未洗就吃，所以牠經常生蟲

麵包超人
經常換麵包頭，所以會經常性嚴重失憶
3)蜘蛛和蜜蜂的婚姻
蜘蛛要和蜜蜂結婚了。

蜘蛛問他媽媽：“爲什麽要我和蜜蜂結婚？”

蜘蛛媽媽說：“蜜蜂是嘮叨了點，可人家好歹是個空姐。”

蜘蛛說：“我比較喜歡蚊子小姐。”

蜘蛛媽媽說：“別提那個小護士了，上次媽生病打針，她把媽打個水腫。”

蜜蜂問她媽媽：“爲什麽要我和蜘蛛結婚？”

蜜蜂媽媽說：“蜘蛛醜是醜了點，可人家好歹是搞網路的。”

蜜蜂說：“螞蟻大哥不錯呀！”

蜜蜂媽媽說：“別提 那小工頭，整天扛著東西東奔西跑的，連部貨車也沒有。”

蜜蜂說：“人家喜歡隔壁的蒼蠅大哥嘛。”蜜蜂媽媽說：“蒼蠅帥是帥了點，可你也不能嫁給個挑糞的 呀！”